What does abandonment look like?

As Daniel has walked around the house screaming for daddy today (and there is not too much I can do, because I threw my back out this morning), I am thinking of Matthew and what he is about to go through.

We have had Daniel for less than 2½ years, and he is heavily bonded to us—especially daddy. He is being tormented by daddy's absence, and yet he can WeChat with daddy, he is still in the same house he's accustomed to, he still has his siblings and his mommy to snuggle, he still has his familiar routine and food....

Matthew is about 6 months younger than Daniel. Matthew has been in the same rehabilitation center for about 3½ years and is familiar with his surroundings, nannies, and fellow orphans. In a little over 24 hours, his world will turn upside down—again.

But, unlike Daniel, he will lose the familiar language, familiar foods, familiar surroundings, familiar smells....

What is abandonment like???

According to our adoption classes it's like having your dream wedding with everything beautiful and shining, and going to bed for the first night snuggled up in your beloved's arms. You are completely warm, comfortable, and in complete bliss. Nothing has ever felt this wonderful before. You are completely in love and completely loved. Then you wake up, and you are in the arms of a stranger. The stranger acts as your husband and does everything to care for you, but all you can do is scream and cry, begging for your beloved to be brought back to you.

Who has taken your beloved away? When will he return?

Days, weeks, and months of crying and your beloved does not return. No more familiar arms around you, no more warm kisses, no more loving embraces from the one your heart adores.

Finally, after you have begun to get used to this new man who has acted as your husband, he takes you in a vehicle, drives you to a government building, and hands you over to another man who will now act as your husband. He tries to love and care for you. You do not understand him. You're scared! You do not want him! You did not choose him! All you want is to understand why you are being tossed away...again. Why? Why is this happening again???

This is your new child. He will be scared beyond what his brain can comprehend! 

Watch:

https://youtu.be/D3twWpo6DfA 

Matthew's world is about to crash, and the trauma will be beyond what he will be able to comprehend. Derek will face this trauma alone—for the first time. Please, please pray for Derek, Matthew, and Andrew as they travel through this time together. THANK YOU!